...attempting to board an aircraft with concealed fish.

[Doc.2/47]

I ain't flyin nowhere, nomore, EVER! This PM I was at the Roenoke Va. airport tryin to get home after my little trip to Salem. A friend there had given me a couple of battery powered "fish" that wiggle around and sing songs. Had those in my carry-on bag. At the checkpoint I was waiting for my bag and boots to come through and this voice comes from somewhere behind and above me: "He's a 'SPECIAL'." I turned around and my nose just about brushed the badge on a XXXL security guy. "Great!" sez I "Does that mean I can go to the SPECIAL Olimpics?"None of the 5-6 security guys now on the scene so much as cracked a smile. I had to assume that to be a negative response. Next thing I knew one bunch had grabbed up my bag an run off in one direction, while another bunch ran off with my jacket in another direction, and Mr. XXXL had me up against a rail frisking me. They eventually conceded that I might be legal after all and gave me my stuff back which made me happy as my feet were cold and really missing my boots.

I've about decided those Federal boys are a wee bit too enthusiastic to associate with.