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#1
10-24-2006, 11:59 AM
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Only In America
Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. Only in America..do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. Only in America ......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. EVER WONDER .... W hy the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin ? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
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Boats O Almighty Lord God, who neither slumberest nor sleepest; Protect and assist, we beseech thee, all those who at home or abroad, by land, by sea, or in the air, are serving this country, that they, being armed with thy defence, may be preserved evermore in all perils; and being filled with wisdom and girded with strength, may do their duty to thy honour and glory; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. "IN GOD WE TRUST" 
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#3
10-25-2006, 04:05 PM
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Here's another "Ever Wonder"
When a woman gets a "perm" why aren't they called "temps" because they only last about 8 weeks. 
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#4
10-25-2006, 05:04 PM
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I got one. A lot of people may noy know about.
Why is giving someone a few bucks to do something you don't want anyone to know about is called a "bribe" and could land you in jail. But on the other hand, when lawyers give money to another lawyer they don't want anyone to know about is called a "referral fee" and is perfectly legal. They do it all the time. LIke Shakespeare said "lets kill all the lawyers".
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"I Have Not Come To Bring Peace, I Have Come With The Sword". Jesus Christ.....Matthew 10:34
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