Out of the Mouths of Children...

[82Rigger]

(1) A little girl was talking to her teacher about
whales. The teacher
said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a
human because even though
it was a very large mammal its throat was very
small. The little girl stated that
Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the
teacher reiterated that a whale
could not swallow a human; it was physically
impossible. The little girl
said, "When I get
to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked,
"What if Jonah didn't go to heaven?
The little girl replied, "Then YOU ask him".

(2) A Kindergarten teacher was observing her
classroom of children while
they were drawing.
She would occasionally walk around to see each
child's work. As she got
to one little girl who
was working diligently, she asked what the
drawing was. The girl
replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows
what God looks like."
Without missing a beat,
or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied,
They will in a minute."

(3) A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten
Commandments with her
five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy
Father and thy Mother, she
asked,
"Is there a commandment that teaches us how to
treat our brothers and
sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest
of a family) answered,
"Thou shall not kill."

(4) One day a little girl was sitting and
watching her mother do the
dishes at the kitchen sink.
She suddenly noticed that her mother had several
strands of white hair
sticking out in contrast
on her brunette head. She looked at her mother
and inquisitively asked,
"Why are some of your
hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well,
every time that you do
something wrong and make
me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought
about this revelation
for a while and then said, Momma, how come ALL
of grandma's hairs are
white?"

(5) The children had all been photographed, and
the teacher was trying to
persuade
them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will
be to look at
it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's
Jennifer, she's a lawyer,'
or 'That's Michael, He's
a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room
rang out, "And there's
the teacher, she's dead."

(6) A teacher was giving a lesson on the
circulation of the blood. Trying
to make the matter
clearer, she said, Now, class, if I stood on my
head, the blood, as you
know, would run into it,
and I would turn red in the face." "Yes," the
class said. "Then why is it
that while I am
standing upright in the ordinary position the
blood doesn't run into my
feet?"
A little fellow shouted,"Cause your feet ain't
empty."

(7) The children were lined up in the cafeteria
of a Catholic elementary
school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of
apples. The nun made a note,
and posted on the
apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the
lunch line, at the
other end of the table was a large pile of
chocolate chip cookies. A
child had written a note,
"Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

[Jerry D]

very well thought out those kids